Tag: covid-19

How Easy Rider Can Help You Navigate Work/Life Integration

Normally, I enjoy writing about work/life balance issues.

Unfortunately, work/life balance has essentially been erased. Because of this pandemic, most of the world has now entered the realm of work/life integration. And so far, at least from my experiences and observations, work/life integration is MUCH harder. Which is unfortunate because many of us were not very good at work/life balance.

How do we navigate these new waters?

TBH, I have no idea. I’m also trying to find my way in this new reality. Only one thing is for sure, I’m a TERRIBLE second-grade teacher!!

But I do know one piece of advice that has NOT been helpful, even though it has been coming from the talking-heads and the gurus among us. Beyond the extremes (injecting heroin 24/7), chastising others for their lack of ambition and productivity is myopic and destructive for many people during these times.

  • “You should learn 5 new skills during quarantine.”
  • “It’s a perfect time to learn Spanish.”
  • “Exercise. You HAVE to do it. If you can’t get into shape now, when can you?”
  • “What a great time to learn to cook.”
  • “If you don’t write that novel you’ve been planning, you were never going to write it.”

Too often, cursing, is a lazy route of communication. But this kind of advice and other advice like it is TOTAL bullshit!!

According to most podcasts hosts, I not only have to learn to do my job 100% virtually, learn how to be a kindergarten and third-grade teacher, learn how to co-exist with my entire family under one roof, get enough food and toilet paper, AND I have to learn Spanish and write a novel? 

NO!

This is crazy talk. Will some of us take advantage of quarantine and come out with new skills? Yes. But most of us are working on only one skill, and it’s called survival.

We’re just trying to figure out day-to-day things we once took for granted. We’re trying to deal with massive job losses for ourselves and our loved ones. We are dealing with uncertainty on a global level. We’re dealing with physical and mental health problems, and many of us are dealing with Covid-related illnesses and sometimes worse.

It’s enough. In fact, it’s too much.

So next time you hear some talking head telling you how you can take advantage of quarantine time, I want you to think about this image.

an image from "Easy Rider" of three men, riding only two chopper-style motorcycles, dressed in Seventies clothes.

This is the iconic image from 1969’s hit movie, Easy Rider. It is also the image that has hung in my friend’s “man-cave” for the past 25 years. The reason he has held on to this image, despite the constant pressure from his wife to throw it out, is because it’s a constant visual reminder of his dominant personal mantra.

There’s a scene in the movie, where Peter Fonda is congratulating his dinner host for leading a good life, and he says “You do your own thing in your own time. You should be proud.” This line stuck with my friend, and it became his guiding life philosophy.

Do your own thing in your own time, means to listen to your internal voice above all others, which is an extremely difficult thing to do, especially in our 24/7 social media world. But if you can apply this mantra consistently, then eventually you will find yourself leading a life that brings YOU happiness and fulfillment. It also means that established rules and norms should be tested and even ignored when they fail to match your internal compass—also a difficult thing to do.

Many of you have type-A personalities. You are trying to improve, get better, and move up. But sometimes you must cut yourself some slack!! Do what you can do. Let the rest go.

“Do your own thing in your own time,” is even more important now. Some days you will be very productive, and some days you will not be. Both are o.k. Don’t beat yourself, or others, up for not living up to false expectations. Unless someone was around for the Spanish Flu, they have no idea what it is like to live under these conditions.

Do the best you can. Period. Just know that some days that might mean curling up in a ball on the couch and watching Joe Exotic for 8 hours.

Do your own thing in your own time. Take care of each other. Work hard. Or not.

Lizard Brain is now in control

In my normal day-to-day existence, I have the privilege of serving some of the best UX and Design professionals in the world.

Because our students are spread across the planet, I need a way to keep in touch with them on a regular basis. So every Monday, they get an extensive email from me—part information they need, and part information designed to improve their professional development.

Since they are all intellectual workers and students, every year I start out by exploring how the brain works. We cover study habits and how to take advantage of various brain waves at various times of the day, how to do deep work and other related topics.

I go in-depth about the three major parts of the brain, the Limbic System, which includes all the modern-person elements. This is the part modern marketers love. The mammalian part is shared by all mammals. Mammals don’t lay eggs, we are predisposed to care for our young, etc. The reptilian brain, the oldest part of the brain, and the part solely focused on danger and keeping you alive. The good news is that you are all currently alive, the bad news is that lizard brain will try to protect you from EVERY risk, all the time. That’s its job.

Normally, my post turns to their professional development, and how lizard brain affects every decision, including changing jobs. No matter where you are in your career and no matter how great the opportunity may be, the reptilian part of your brain will NEVER be “good” with a change. It will always want you to remain safe and remain where you are. Always! Again, that’s its job, and it has no other job. Now, it’s the other parts of your brain, and your life, that should be able to overcome lizard brain, but I think it’s valuable just to recognize we all have this uncontrollable element affecting our decisions to some degree.

In other words, lizard brain is constantly affecting your daily life, often without your knowledge.

Most research concludes that because our modern world has no equivalent of being stalked by a lion, our always-working lizard brain finds things to be “scared” of, as if it was an actual lion. When in fact, it’s just you presenting a PowerPoint to a manager and some colleagues. Yet, because of lizard brain, your mind and body reacts and releases chemicals (adrenaline, norepinephrine, and cortisol) as if there is an actual lion.

But now, there is a lion. There is an invisible microscopic lion, that kills, and is currently stalking every part of the planet. For most of us, this means our lizard brains have taken over. Most of us, even those who have self-quarantined, are experiencing much higher-than-normal levels of cortisol, higher blood pressure, and increased heart rates. (me included)

How to silence lizard brain

First, exercise. I know, I know, that’s advise you’ve heard a thousand times. But you’ve heard it so often because it’s true. Right now, it’s chemical warfare inside your body. Exercise will release the chemicals to cancel out the negative chemicals released by your reptilian brain.

Next, use the Limbic System of your powerful brain to acknowledge lizard-brain’s existence, then tell it to “shut-up”. This is just another way to say “be mindful”. Your Limbic System is used to driving the car. But now, it must force its way into the driver’s seat. This can be done through mindfulness and meditation. I know, I know, meditation is hard, and many people have tried it and discarded it (me included). But if you want to go this route, there are now many excellent apps to aid you in this pursuit.

Lastly, maybe it’s o.k. to let lizard brain drive for a while. Not forever. But right now, all of our resources need to be used to survive, so why not let the part of your brain dedicated to survival run the show? I’m not saying disregard the higher-functioning parts of your brain, please utilize that as well. But for a while, all of our awareness needs to be cautious of threats. The quicker everyone can get there (Some states STILL think Covid-19 is a joke, or “just like the flu”. Looking at you Florida, West Virginia, and Georgia) the quicker we can all go back to worrying about our Power Point presentations instead of a global pandemic.

Be well. Be safe. If you’re NOT an essential employee, stay at home. The essential employees are risking their lives for us, the absolute least we can do is make some popcorn, invite lizard brain on the couch, and you both can Netflix and chill for them.